Category Archives: Autism

Parenting Fail- It was a little Mom-troversial…

I feel like a criminal and a failure as a mom. Because I did something I was not supposed to do. It made me feel so bad. I felt like a total failure as a mom. But I had no choice. I could see the look of disappointment on the faces of all those who have been supporting me. How could I do this to my child? How could I have let myself do it? I could have stuck to my guns, held my ground, been super mom. I was a failure. And I still am. My crime…is horrific. Especially to a lot of mommas out there. But…I am on a budget, and honestly not ready to deal with the volatile environment anymore. My house has become downright…hostile. So I did it. I gave in. I failed. His doctor was so shocked. But…I…Fed my child a sandwich. On WHITE BREAD.  Yep. I fed him a sandwich. A horrible gluten filled mass of peanut-butter and NOT sugar free jam. And a package of GUMMY SNACKS. Worst. Mom. EVER.

You see…the reason this will be seen as a crime is I have been trying to go Paleo for him. I am trying to eliminate all gluten, all food dyes, and all sugar from his diet. But Hurricane is like a crack addict with the bread and crackers. He is taking the sugar thing in stride. Some whining, but tolerable. But the bread. The glorious, glorious, bread. It is his go to comfort food. His snack of choice. And he was hating me. With a passion.

Hurricane has a hard time in school. They are throwing around the words ADD/ADHD, and he already has a diagnosis of Sensory Pervasive Disorder. Before they pull the go to “Maybe he needs medication” card, aka the “Make your child an obedient robot zombie” choice, I was looking at options and I called his awesomeamazingwonderfultakescareofmeinspiteoflackofinsurance Occupational Therapist for her opinion. She agreed with several of my friends and family members we needed to start with his diet. Not that he ate badly. But he did eat more processed and more sugar than he should. So I went cold turkey. And it. Has been. HELL.

As he munched his meat roll ups and ate his raw veggies at lunch, he was loathing me. He was coming home and laying into me. He was cranky. He was irate. In short, my six year old child had become, an asshole. And I was warned, he would detox, but he would be fine after TWO OR THREE WEEKS. I’m sorry. But I have NO patience for that madness. I want to enjoy snuggles and happy time in our limited time together. With me working three jobs I barely see my son. So to spend the time we have together fighting, was not working for me. So I did it. I gave in. I made him a sandwich. I am still sticking to sugar free.  I am giving him more fresh fruit, raw veggies, and more. I am slowly cutting back his intake of gluten. But I refuse to go cold turkey. Because I love my son and I want to be happy together not fighting.

So…pass the boy his rolls and dairy free butter.


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