Out of the mouths of babes…a Mom-troversial Moment or two…

We do things a lot different in the Mom-T household. We are ALL full of sass and crass. It’s just the Mom-T way. So I should never be shocked at the things that my child says or my students say. Or the fact even King Pig (my husband for you newbies) can say or do things that are a bit…controversial or just down right hilarious.  For example…

Hurricane has decided he wants to be a fireman. So everything in his world is firefighters. Drawings, stories, books, videos. His favorite show is Rescue Heroes.  He made a drawing of a buidling on fire being put out by firemen. ANd my husband told him it was missing the screaming victims. Now, Hurricane can NOT pronounce the word horror. It always comes out WHORE. So he draws this awesome picture, my husband says his piece and Hurricane flips. “Damn it daddy! It’s always whores with you! Whores whores whores! All you ever talk about is whores. BIG whores, bad whores. Its firemen daddy. NOT whores.” I was laughing too hard to correct him to HORROR or admonish him for saying damn it. Another time I was eating my favorite pickles, a brand called Bubbies. (Best pickles EVER, BTW).

“Whatcha eating mommy? Pickles? Mommy they are… (sounds out label) Boooooobies. Mommy you look happy to have those Boooobies in your mouth….”

Then there was my students deciding to talk in all numbers. To pass the long drive on a field trip, one of the students started a “talk in mostly numbers” game” Being me… I got into it. They got loud. I threatened to “pull this van over right now and 137 you guys right now!” One of the students responded and I almost wrecked. (Names changed, obviously) “Well, Ms. Mom T, if you pull over to 137 us we will all get even. Bubble girl will 39 you, Puppy-boy will 49 you, Captain Mad will 59 you, and I will…” I had to cut him off. I almost wrecked laughing. But yeah. Of all the numbers for him to pick…

Songs are the best as well. Lyrics being sung completely wrong, or completely right. And funny. For example, we were not Making Thunderherds, we were “Making up with Nerds”. And don’t get me started on the Barbie girl song…

And no one can ever forget him telling me I needed to get peanut butter for my pussy. Because the kitten had gum in her fur. Yep. Kids.

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About momtroversial

I am a mom who often parents in ways that are considered too old fashioned or too unconventional. My husband went through a major mental health breakdown and took me on the roller coaster with him. At some point we will get off this damn ride. I recently went through a series of life altering events that have made me re-think my whole outlook on life. I am trying to be the kind of mom my work as a career nanny should have prepared me for but it does not always work. I hope to impact the lives of others that I KNOW are living with the same fears, hopes, dreams, anger, pain, joy, and more. Suicide and ink and children and life. That's about it. View all posts by momtroversial

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